Dating Scammers, what are they, how to spot them and what to do

Online dating is a safe and happy way to meet people, as long as you keep your wits about you. Sadly, scammers know that many older South Africans are kind, trusting and have worked hard for their savings, and that is exactly why they target us. At Singles Over 70 we take fraud very seriously and work hard to keep these chancers off the site, but the best defence of all is you.

What Is A Dating Scammer?

A dating scammer is someone who pretends to be looking for love when really they are after your money. It is a crime, usually called romance fraud, and the people behind it are often organised and very patient.

How To Spot A Dating Scammer

Language and grammar
Does the way they write match where they claim to be from? Someone who says they grew up in Bloemfontein should know what a braai is, and should not write like a badly translated instruction manual. Watch out for odd phrases such as "Hello my dear", "I am Richard by name" or "I hope to be reading from you soonest".

Moving too fast
Talk of soulmates and undying love after three messages? Real people take their time. Scammers rush, because the sooner you are emotionally hooked, the sooner they can ask for money.

Requests for money
Never send money, vouchers or airtime to someone you have met online, however sad the story. Favourite tales include a plane ticket to come and visit you, an urgent medical bill, customs fees on a parcel or a business deal stuck overseas. Never share your banking details, PIN or one time passwords (OTPs) with anyone. No genuine admirer needs your OTP.

Profiles that do not add up
Be wary of profiles that claim to be working overseas, on an oil rig, in the military or for a charity, or that have almost nothing written in them. If the photo looks like it came out of a magazine, it may well have. A widowed engineer with film star looks, working on a ship off the coast of Angola, is a classic.

Trust Your Instincts

If something feels off, it usually is. Ask a family member or a good friend for their opinion, a fresh pair of eyes can spot what a fond heart misses.

Protect Your Privacy

Be careful if someone you have only just met wants to move the conversation to WhatsApp, email or social media straight away. Scammers do this to get away from our moderators. Take your time and keep chatting on the site until you are comfortable.

How Do I Report A Suspected Scammer?

If someone does not seem to be who they say they are, or makes you uneasy in any way, scroll to the bottom of their profile and click the "Report profile" link, which looks like this:

Your report is strictly confidential and the member will not know it came from you. We also suggest you click "Ignore" so they cannot contact you again. They will simply no longer see your profile and will most likely assume you have left. Our team will then look into it and take the right action.

Been Caught Out?

If you think you have been scammed, do not be embarrassed, it happens to clever people every day. Phone your bank immediately so they can try to stop any payments, then report it at your local SAPS police station. The South African Banking Risk Information Centre (SABRIC) has helpful advice on staying safe here: https://www.sabric.co.za/how-to-stay-safe/.

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